Don Hall 9/4/23 Don Hall 9/4/23

I Believe... [Pretending to Work]

...that there is a clear difference between being busy and working. The first is about perception, the second about results.

Joe Janes 9/4/23 Joe Janes 9/4/23

The Cereal Wish | Part 5

I wake up lying flat out in the entry hall closet we never use because we are too lazy to open the door. I’m lying on boxes of Chocolate Peanut Butter Cheerios I had wished into being. There are even some extras to make a pillow for my head. Melted chocolate is streaming out of the boxes like cookie blood. I can hear Maggie snuffling at the doorway.

Contributing Writer 9/3/23 Contributing Writer 9/3/23

The Cereal Wish | Part 4

As you have already learned, I am a quick thinker. Like, how I used my second wish to live inside of the classic sitcom Cheers. Yep. Everything is going to be smooth sailing from here on out.

It’s true that I’ll miss my girlfriend, Sarah, but as Dave Matthews said in a Facebook post in 2018, “What a great ending of a great tour!”

Norm walks over to me.

Don Hall 9/2/23 Don Hall 9/2/23

The Best New Eldercare

He understood this as he was in his eighties and that’s what happens to humans even when they take good care of themselves and have, as he did, top tier health benefits.

MT Cozzola 9/2/23 MT Cozzola 9/2/23

The Cereal Wish | Part 3

“What can I do for you?” asked the funnel of incense as it materialized into a small-boned woman in a red Chanel suit.

David Himmel 9/1/23 David Himmel 9/1/23

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of August 27, 2023

Having spent much of my life being told I’m “too much,” being told that I should be more myself—more David in his natural state—is a strange pill to swallow. And I’m afraid I don’t recommend it. Then again, these are strange times, and perhaps it’s time for stranger things to happen.

Guest User 9/1/23 Guest User 9/1/23

The Cereal Wish | Part 2

And there I was, twenty minutes later out trucking with Maggie four blocks away now from our place down Algren Street. It seemed to be nap time for the rest of the world while I took the much-needed air.

David Himmel 8/31/23 David Himmel 8/31/23

The Cereal Wish | Part 1 (Again)

Thank God for the dog. If not for her, my girlfriend wouldn’t let me leave the house. When the pandemic got serious, she didn’t care about toilet paper; she b-lined it for the milk. Our freezer is perfectly packed with Swedish meatballs, broccoli florets, and twenty-three gallon-size Ziplocs of milk.

David Himmel 8/30/23 David Himmel 8/30/23

A Brief Poem About a Writer Who Doesn't Write—Revisited

They say—they being creative writing professors, esteemed novelists, and hacks with wordy Instagram posts alike—that writers write. Writers who get their shit out there—not all of it, but enough of it—are the real writers. True warriors of the pen and keys.

Contributing Writer 8/29/23 Contributing Writer 8/29/23

[Revisited] American Shithole #25 — Can the Dying Mule Become the Butterfly?

We are still in the age of clutching things. We humans like to clutch. Our belongings, our pearls. Our ideas. Our instincts to gather and protect were selected long ago — so the idea that resource collecting is at the heart of our concerns today, is a tough pickle to swallow, compounded by the behavior’s hidden influence on all other human doctrine.

Don Hall 8/28/23 Don Hall 8/28/23

I Believe... [Tap Dancing on Eggs]

...that the best response to a society hellbent on requiring the careful, nervous walk through a minefield of eggshells is to tap dance on every fucking egg.

David Himmel 8/25/23 David Himmel 8/25/23

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of August 20, 2023

I should've been a plumber. At least then being covered in shit feels productive.

Don Hall 8/22/23 Don Hall 8/22/23

Casino at the End of the World

A curious cocktail topped off with a garnish of self-reflection, which is something all of us could use as the world hears those rarely-uttered words, “Last call!”

Don Hall 8/22/23 Don Hall 8/22/23

Jewface? JEWFACE?!?

Gimme a break.

Don Hall 8/21/23 Don Hall 8/21/23

I Believe... [Apolitical Storms?]

...that the naming of hurricanes is likely to be apolitical but c’mon, guys.

Don Hall 8/19/23 Don Hall 8/19/23

If We Choose to Eat Shit, Is It Really the Fault of the Chef?

“What are you, stupid? All the food you eat is shit. Eat the sushi, dumb fucks.”

David Himmel 8/18/23 David Himmel 8/18/23

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of August 13, 2023

The hardest part about being an adult is the same as being a kid: so often, you have to do things you just really, really don’t want to do.

Don Hall 8/17/23 Don Hall 8/17/23

Same As It Ever Was

Don Hall 8/15/23 Don Hall 8/15/23

Try That in a Small Town

Small, rural areas operate by their own rules in part because they’re too tiny for the rest of us to really spend time worrying about them but these small towns are the canaries in the coal mine when it comes to how society works.

Don Hall 8/14/23 Don Hall 8/14/23

I Believe... [Human Babies Require Our Pity to Survive]

...that human babies coming out of the womb helpless and unable to walk make other animals seem superior.