Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of May 17, 2020
Is there anything in the world cuter than a toddler parroting back to you, “Goddammit! Jesus…”? The answer is yes. That same toddler parroting back to you, “The fuck is your problem?”
The Cereal Wish | Part 3
“What can I do for you?” asked the funnel of incense as it materialized into a small-boned woman in a red Chanel suit.
The Heaviness and Lightness of Old Age
The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Have A Productive Day!
Alcohol optional. I mean, optimal.
The Cereal Wish | Part 2
And there I was, twenty minutes later out trucking with Maggie four blocks away now from our place down Algren Street. It seemed to be nap time for the rest of the world while I took the much-needed air.
The Cereal Wish
Fast & Short is a flash fiction collaboration between eight Literate Ape writers. Each was tasked with authoring one piece of flash fiction that would be combined to create a single short story. The writers’ flash fiction needed to serve two purposes: 1) Stand alone as a unique piece of flash fiction and 2) Serve as a vehicle for building a larger story and driving that story forward. Here is that developing story.
I Like to Watch | Game of Thrones (All Eight Seasons in Three Weeks)
…if Martin were trying convey some sort of overarching message it was not that power corrupts but those who pursue power are corrupted by the pursuit.
![I Believe… [Brandon Stark in 2020]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/579fa3912994ca0eff850271/1589696570643-Y3B0CIZAIBXTX949F6SQ/IMG_0693.jpeg)
I Believe… [Brandon Stark in 2020]
I believe… that I don’t need the presidential nominee to be exciting. I’ve had nearly four years of exciting and I’d like a nice, competent president that I only know about when he (or she) passes some quality legislation that helps the country. Maybe someone like Brandon Stark.
The Cereal Wish | Part 1
Thank God for the dog. If not for her, my girlfriend wouldn’t let me leave the house. When the pandemic got serious, she didn’t care about toilet paper; she b-lined it for the milk. Our freezer is perfectly packed with Swedish meatballs, broccoli florets, and twenty-three gallon-size Ziplocs of milk.
Pedants vs. Thugs: Examining the Bedrock of Modern Protest Movements
The Far Right is just doing what they have always done. Take the tactics of their perceived enemies and use them for their own ends.
A Toxic Friendship Fairy Tale
A darkly delightful tale of a hare standing up for herself against a selfish, useless, ignorant fucking bunny.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of May 10, 2020
A lot of people have gotten new puppies during this pandemic. Look, if you need an excuse to go outside, just start smoking. It’s cheaper and cleaner. And I’ve never had to scrub cigarette poo-poo out of a carpet.
The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | It’s a Date! I Think. Maybe.
He sees a Luke Skywalker figurine on the shelf behind him and he moves it to the floor.
If I Die in Hospice
In the instance where my life does not end
Me out there sailing through a sudden squall or
failing to outrun the authorities after a good-natured display of public violence
If I happen to fall victim of illness or extreme age
And die under the care of hospice,
A few things must occur
Lest I haunt this overheated watery rock for eternity
Play the hits.
Running from Grief
There’s an odd disconnect between dealing with legitimate grief and typing “budget cremation wichita” into the search bar.
![I Believe… [Class Warfare Prime]](https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/579fa3912994ca0eff850271/1589033992492-RVTLTXFG7P5WKZ8ABJXG/IMG_0693.png)
I Believe… [Class Warfare Prime]
…that it’s not class warfare if you’re still ordering things from Amazon.
Trust in the Media is a Necessary Choice
I won’t tell you which sources you should trust. That’s up to you. But I will tell you that the ones you do trust should be sources that are trustworthy. Organizations and individuals that peddle rebuked reports, proven misinformation, and outright lies should not make your list. The internet may be part of the problem, but it’s also the cure. It is easier than ever to fact check and determine the credibility of your news. The thing is, you need to have a little credibility yourself.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of May 3, 2020
I wonder what the COVID-19 memorial will look like. No doubt it’ll dwarf the Vietnam War Memorial. My hope is that the biggest difference between the two is that Trump’s name will be one of them.
The Adventures of Aborted Andy | Episode I: Meeting Your Maker
Andy disassembled his weapon with lighting speed. He packed it away in the black backpack made specifically for a weapon of this sort. He bolted to the roof access door as fast as his little, chubby legs would carry him. He made his way through the condo/office building stairwell without being noticed just as he had done on his way up. Andy was good at his job. And for a nine-month-old baby, he was really good at it.
The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Trump Live Tweets Gettysburg Address
ILIKE WAR HEROES THAT WEREN’T KILLED..
“They waited for the next frightened person to confuse survival with surrender.”