MT Cozzola 3/7/23 MT Cozzola 3/7/23

Memory is a T.J. Maxx

When she was seventy-three, Mom got arrested at a T.J. Maxx. They brought her to a little security office and laid out the charge: switching price tags, which she denied. "The tag came off! I was trying to fix it!"

Don Hall 3/6/23 Don Hall 3/6/23

I Believe... [Signed Copy, Plz]

...that the best reaction to the release of my latest book is “I’d like a signed copy. But not by you.”

Don Hall 3/2/23 Don Hall 3/2/23

The Hanging Out Conundrum

. In 1990, 63% of Americans reported having five or more close friends. In 2021, only 38% did. On an average day 20 years ago, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics’ Time Use Survey, 38% of Americans socialized or communicated with friends. By 2021, that number was down to 28%.

Joe Janes 3/1/23 Joe Janes 3/1/23

Hogwarts Public School of Witchcraft and Sorcery – St. Louis

You will receive mentorship from experienced underpaid faculty and unqualified substitute teachers who will herd you in your journey.

Don Hall 2/28/23 Don Hall 2/28/23

Straight from the Whore-says Mouth (Her Joke, Not Mine)

A "sad, revenge-porn-filled, revisionist history, bewilderingly judgmental, impotent kink-shame laden sloppy mess of a collection."

Don Hall 2/27/23 Don Hall 2/27/23

I Believe... [Small Town Tenacity]

...that there are few things in society as pernicious and unrelenting as a tiny rural town in pursuit of a traffic fine. If the IRS had these hayseeds in charge of cracking down on corporations and billionaires, there would be no American debt crisis.

David Himmel 2/24/23 David Himmel 2/24/23

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of February 19, 2023

My wife wants me to be more assertive in bed. So, I’ve started pushing her over while she’s asleep to claim my fair share of the bed.

Joe Janes 2/22/23 Joe Janes 2/22/23

AI Generated Minutes

God is dead.

Don Hall 2/21/23 Don Hall 2/21/23

Revision for Comfort? Safety? What the Fuck?

I'd hazard a guess that when, in lockstep with a specific worldview, an industry adopts the practices of an authoritarian regime it might signal some alarm klaxons.

Don Hall 2/20/23 Don Hall 2/20/23

I Believe... [Potter Litmus]

...that the new marker of whether or not I want to engage with someone is the answer to the question “So, what do you think of JK Rowling?”

Don Hall 2/19/23 Don Hall 2/19/23

My Cake is the True Cake Demands the Fanatic

It's a trick, like magic, that forces reevaluation of language, both what it means and how we use it. Given that most of us use language as a blunt instrument, it is an especially dangerous trick in the hands of yellow journalism, philosophers, and those seeking to influence the body politic.

Contributing Writer 2/18/23 Contributing Writer 2/18/23

Wisdom of the Creatives | From the Archives

Long perched upon my living room table is a book gifted to me by an old friend called The War of Art, a play on Sun Tzu’s Art of War—only geared toward the creative process. Glancing through it once again this New Year's Eve, putting it down I resolved to seek more inspiration in my life, which in turn makes me more creative in my own life.

David Himmel 2/17/23 David Himmel 2/17/23

Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of February 12, 2023

The sign of a good Chicago neighborhood is not the property value or the level of crime, but whether neighbors shovel more than just the sidewalk in front of their house.

Joe Mallon 2/16/23 Joe Mallon 2/16/23

Killer

Connor smiled…. “Ye made a mistake, lad. A dire one, I’m afraid. Ye ran into a fella like me. Too bad for you.

“We have police business with this young man. Unfortunately, we’re going to have to ask you to leave.”

Joe Janes 2/15/23 Joe Janes 2/15/23

Scientists Confirm Assholes Go Out Of Their Way To Make Your Life Miserable

Whether being cut off in traffic or denied trans healthcare by a state governor, scientists have concluded that, yes, indeed, assholes will go out of their way to make sure your life is miserable.

Don Hall 2/13/23 Don Hall 2/13/23

I Believe… [Age is the Number of Pounds Your Back Can Sustain]

..that, while personally moving all my stuff to a seventh floor apartment by myself makes my dude brain feel all badass, my back would like to register an official complaint to HR.

Don Hall 2/13/23 Don Hall 2/13/23

“I Didn’t Marry a Prostitute…” The Perfect Anti-Valentine

On Valentine’s Day I’m launching my latest Literate Ape Press venture “I Didn’t Marry a Prostitute: A Sordid Tale of Deceit, Disillusionment, and Divorce” available through Amazon.