Santa's Gift
Ricky stood in the snow with one sneaker untied and his backpack hanging far too low on his back. His breath misted in the frigid December air. He shook, but not from the cold. His mother taught him to layer up, making it almost impossible to catch a chill.
No, his shivers were from fear. A fear he had every year. But this year was going to be different.
A Merry Christmas Punch/CounterPunch On the Sensitive Topic of One Mr. George Bailey, Part Two
I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. It’s just so hard to argue something I no longer believe. Don Hall is right. George Bailey is not a good person. He never took a single step outside of Bedford Falls. His family lives in a drafty old house that he used to throw rocks at. He has a kid named Zuzu. Zuzu—short for Pazuzu, the demon from The Exorcist… I just, I can’t.
F@#&! - It’s Christmas! Give Yourself the Gift of TSA Pre-Check In
For $80, the TSA will trust you to not blow up or hijack any commercial airplanes.
A Merry Christmas Punch/CounterPunch On the Sensitive Topic of One Mr. George Bailey, Part One
But did that room full of people really know George Bailey? Did they fully grasp his horrible failure as a human being before throwing down the money he lost?
Who was George Bailey and why do we in the Age of Cancel Culture want to see him escape his tragic fall?
I Believe... [Trump Cards?]
...that $99 is a steal for a Donald Trump Official Digital Trading Card but the very person who would appreciate it most can’t work his phone and is still using a 2005 Dell desktop.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of December 11, 2022
More of those JFK files have been released. Still, a lot of CIA info remains redacted. They don’t want us to know their practices, which is fair. National security and all that. But, they also don’t want us to know how they killed him.
The Final Stage of Grief
Sunday, May 11, 2014 was the day things changed. All of the inspirational phrases, carefully set in creative fonts, became pronouncements of love.
Senator Kyrsten Sinema Switches Species
Arizona deserves a representative that speaks for them and is gelatinous.
When You Can't Tell the Difference Between Snake Oil and Hair Tonic
We are now in the Golden Age of the Grift.
I Believe... [Website Design is a Service]
...that if the government can compel a website designer to provide the service for a gay wedding, it can likewise compel another website designer to provide the service for a Neo-Nazi wedding and, in my opinion, it should in both cases.
Miss Emma
If he didn’t know better, he could have imagined himself a prisoner in his own car.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of December 4, 2022
Revolutions don’t die; people grow tired.
I Like to Watch | The Best and Worst of 2022
Doesn't Schrader know that there was a rogue wave that hit a cruise ship and pulled a woman overboard? Is he aware of the fact the democracy is ending... what? It didn't end? What the fuck?
I the People - Donald Trump's New Constitution
We will now say “Merry Christmas” after the pledge of allegiance.
Still Got It
Part of getting older is realizing that you are, in fact, older. And in many cases, we age out of our horned up youth into a relaxed state of domestication. But it’s naturally human to wonder if you still got it. If you’re still an object of interest—not affection—to the people you meet or even pass on the street or at Target on Sunday mornings.
Law School Might Have Been a Good Idea If Money Was the Object of My Dreams
I look around and one of the professions cleaning up is law. Lawyers are making serious bank on stupid lawsuits designed to appease the moral indignation of people looking to game the system by way of legislation.
I Believe... [The Perfect Christmas Playlist]
...that Violent Night joins my perfect Christmas playlist along with Bad Santa, The Ref, and, yes, David Himmel, Die Hard.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of November 27, 2022
What’s worse than a cold bathroom? The Holocaust. That’s it.
To Manage Stress, Remember You Could Die in the Next Ten Seconds
No, dying is not that scary. It's unfathomable because it is a leap into a void of the unknown and unknowable, but not something which we should shy away.
Memo from Elon Musk
People have the freedom to share their opinions about anything – movies, TV shows, the Jews.
Monte imagined approaching the counter.
“Hello, I hear Morgan Freeman narrating my life.”