[Still Relevant] What We Can Learn from Charlize Theron, Elon Musk, and Trevor Noah (Copy)
Charlize Theron was born in South Africa. Elon Musk was born in South Africa. Trevor Noah was born in South Africa. Yet, of these three brilliant, talented, successful people, only one was born a crime in South Africa.
[Worth Revisiting] A Toxic Friendship Fairy Tale
A darkly delightful tale of a hare standing up for herself against a selfish, useless, ignorant fucking bunny.
[Archived But Fresh] Humans are Scum
I cannot express how excited I am. Because over the past couple weeks since I was assigned this topic, I’ve been overwhelmed by this deep, dark despair. But in the next few minutes, I get to unload it all onto you, and then I can resume the carefree complacency to which I’ve grown accustomed.
You. People. Suck.
It’s true and you all know it and here are seven reasons why.
I Believe... [GenX Kids Were Monsters]
...that, if you’re honest with yourself, you know that you and your prepubescent friends would’ve beat E.T. with rebar and hammers, would’ve absolutely ostracized Edward Scissorhands, and would’ve taken Rick Moranis’s shrunken kids and put them in a mason jar with a firecracker.
[From the Archives] Required Watching: Mr. Death: The Rise and Fall of Fred A. Leuchter, Jr. (1999)
Time for another installment of Required Watching where we knock you out of your comfortable routine of TV and movies to show you a documentary that's weird for the sole purpose of making you a better person. Knowledge is power.
[From Back in the Day] All Art is Political
But where, might you ask, is Art in all this. Well, if the concept of Politics precedes everything, guess what, Art, informs everything that politics and language created because 70,000 years ago, Homo sapiens developed an ability no other animal possesses, the ability to imagine that what which can not be seen. In other words, Imagination. If there is a dividing line between art and imagination, I’m hard pressed to find it.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of October 30, 2022
Childhood goes by fast. When you’re a parent, it goes by even faster.
If Not Biden, Who?
Yeah, politics has become a Bizarro World version of the wrestling world of ridiculous hype and flexing muscles but it still actually matters.
Rick Scott’s 12-Point Plan to Rescue America
We will secure our borders and only let in hot blondes.
[ARCHIVED] I Was a Teenage Space Billionaire
I built a city in the desert.
Lithium and plastic and dry cellulose.
Autonomous flying cars.
Drone-delivered impossible everything,
Nourishing our body-positive bodies.
Streaming, bingeable Obama-produced documentaries
In every remote classroom.
There was even a monorail.
The Easy Gullibility at the Heart of Self Proclaimed Identity
In the parlance of a generation a few beyond my own "I don't care what you call me as long as you don't call me late for dinner."
I Believe... [Leaving Elon's Twitter]
...that the same people screaming that they’ll be leaving Twitter because Musk owns it are the exact same people who vowed to move to Canada if Trump was elected and guess what? They are full of shit. We know they’re full of shit so do we take their admonitions about anything else seriously?
Farewell to Las Vegas
It wasn't supposed to go this way but the universe giggles when we make plans.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of July 17, 2022
Parenthood is, by far, the trippiest, mind bending, and just straight up weirdest thing I’ve ever experienced.
When Your Ideas Become Your Identity, Disagreements Become Personal Attacks
The more each of us aligns our identities with orthodoxy, the harder it is to separate ourselves from the talking points of ideology.
Dead Man’s Hill
What appeared to be a man, hovered over a smoldering fire smoking a cigarette. His bony purple fingers tightly gripping a rectangular bottle.
Notes from the Post-it Wall | Week of October 23, 2022
In matters of family planning—that is, choosing a mate—keep in mind that the money will come; the love doesn’t always show up. Don’t let money buy your heart.
Who Are 'The Working Class' and Aren't Most of Us Already Them?
Beyond the hyperbolic rhetoric that states quite clearly and with great repetition that a vote for pretty much anyone of any ideological stripe is the final nail in the coffin for our democratic way of life, there is the drumbeat that gives us that delicious rhythm of the Great Abandonment of the Working Class.
Dr. Oz’s Miracle Cures for Our Nation
The solution to abortion is a pill. No. Wait.
I, Substitute
The job description should read “Must be able to hand out papers, sit bored out of your skull, make sure the lunatics don’t take over the asylum with no authority, no hope for respect from the inmates, and no real idea if they are lying to you when they tell you that their regular class work involves smartphones and flaming hot covered salt lick snacks.”
Jake and Caroline’s first date was at The Whistler. They talked about Ronnie, how much they loved The Diplomat, and debated the better ride-share service, Uber or Lyft. She was Uber, he was Lyft. They got wasted on Sazeracs and had sex at her apartment. It was incredible for both of them. Caroline stopped taking sex advice from Ronnie.