Zuckerberg and Dorsey have the power to melt our faces off with their laser eyeballs and we either trust that they won’t use that power on the wrong people when their having a rough morning or regulate their power in ways that no longer leave it up to their whim. Because that’s why Trump has been de-platformed. The whim of two men in charge of the most powerful communications networks in the history of mankind.

Lex – Almost only counts in horseshoes and massive flu virus outbreaks.

I’ve never been a fan of haunted houses. I spook too easily, I guess. I’m not the guy they want walking through their halls anyhow. In past houses I’ve committed all offenses in reaction to being spooked: punched a worker square in the nose; stomped to death some kind of mechanical tentacle protruding from the floorboards; grabbed a psychotic clown by his wig and headbutted him in the teeth; made my wife go first.

Around this time of year, I’m a bigger fan of staying in where the people around me are safe. But I still enjoy giving myself the heebie-jeebies. That’s why I’m offering you, dear reader, my pick of the Top 5 Scariest Films you should watch this Halloween.

1. Shutter

2. Gravity

3. The Force Awakens

4. Superman III

5. Mannequin

Batman – Sorry I didn’t come from another planet like you, or that I’m not some meta-human freak, or a woman. I have money and I have bullets. And a cool car.