0
Skip to Content
LITERATE APE
Magazine
Podcasts
Bookshelf
LITERATE APE
Magazine
Podcasts
Bookshelf
Magazine
Podcasts
Bookshelf
Featured
The Adventures of Aborted Andy | Episode I: Meeting Your Maker
July 30, 2026
David Himmel
The Adventures of Aborted Andy | Episode I: Meeting Your Maker
July 30, 2026
David Himmel

Andy disassembled his weapon with lighting speed. He packed it away in the black backpack made specifically for a weapon of this sort. He bolted to the roof access door as fast as his little, chubby legs would carry him. He made his way through the condo/office building stairwell without being noticed just as he had done on his way up. Andy was good at his job. And for a nine-month-old baby, he was really good at it.

Read more →
July 30, 2026
David Himmel

ARCHIVE OF ARTICLES

No results found

 

I Believe… [Beware The Golden Rule If You're An Asshole]
Don Hall, I Believe... Don Hall 11/19/18 Don Hall, I Believe... Don Hall 11/19/18

I Believe… [Beware The Golden Rule If You're An Asshole]

…that in the spirit of the Golden Rule, if you have decided it’s appropriate to harass people on the street or in front of their homes to make a political point, you deserve exactly the same treatment when taking your kids out to Chuck E. Cheese.

Read More
I Believe... [Repentance is Like Shitting in One Hand and Wishing in the Other]
I Believe..., Don Hall Don Hall 8/27/18 I Believe..., Don Hall Don Hall 8/27/18

I Believe... [Repentance is Like Shitting in One Hand and Wishing in the Other]

...that human actions are no more evil than a hurricane’s. We assign evil to problems as if repentance will solve them. Contrition is no more helpful to fixing society than looking at the floodwaters and winds and falling to your knees to pray and blame someone/something for them. 

Read More
ABOUT LITERATE APE
CONTACT THE APES
ARE YOU A WRITER?

LiterateApe.com and Literate Ape Press
est. 2016
A Nevada 501(c)(3)

Powered by Squarespace