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The Adventures of Aborted Andy | Episode I: Meeting Your Maker
July 30, 2026
David Himmel
The Adventures of Aborted Andy | Episode I: Meeting Your Maker
July 30, 2026
David Himmel

Andy disassembled his weapon with lighting speed. He packed it away in the black backpack made specifically for a weapon of this sort. He bolted to the roof access door as fast as his little, chubby legs would carry him. He made his way through the condo/office building stairwell without being noticed just as he had done on his way up. Andy was good at his job. And for a nine-month-old baby, he was really good at it.

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July 30, 2026
David Himmel

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The Minutes of Our Last Meeting - Trump's Perfect Call to the CDC
Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 3/4/20 Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 3/4/20

The Minutes of Our Last Meeting - Trump's Perfect Call to the CDC

I just wanted to tell you that I am doing a terrific job.

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The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | The Official White House Response to the Caronavirus
Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 2/26/20 Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 2/26/20

The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | The Official White House Response to the Caronavirus

We should also take all those cancer-causing windmills along the coasts and borders and point them out toward the oceans.

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The Minutes of Our Last Meeting – Presidential Medal of Rush
Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 2/5/20 Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 2/5/20

The Minutes of Our Last Meeting – Presidential Medal of Rush

I want my State of the Union speech to melt all the snowflakes across America, like if climate change were a real thing.

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The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Space Poop Jesus!
Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 12/11/19 Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 12/11/19

The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Space Poop Jesus!

“Where you see one set of footprints is where I continued walking and you took a golf cart.”

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The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Presidential Pardons
Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 11/20/19 Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 11/20/19

The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Presidential Pardons

I have a lot of respect for soldiers who don’t say bad things about me.

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The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Presidential Boos News
Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 11/6/19 Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 11/6/19

The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Presidential Boos News

I killed the leader of ISIS, the most dangerous man in the world since Hilary Clinton.

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The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Lynching Lite
Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 10/23/19 Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 10/23/19

The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Lynching Lite

Are you telling me white people aren’t allowed to be lynched? That’s racist!

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The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Trump’s Homeless Solution
Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 9/18/19 Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 9/18/19

The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Trump’s Homeless Solution

What if we made homeless people pretty?

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The Minutes of Our Last Meeting I Always Remember Trump
Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 9/11/19 Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 9/11/19

The Minutes of Our Last Meeting I Always Remember Trump

This will be a 9/11 people will never forget!

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The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Be Bester
Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 6/26/19 Joe Janes, Minutes of Our Last Mtg Joe Janes 6/26/19

The Minutes of Our Last Meeting | Be Bester

Make Children Great Again!

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