I Love You and I Want You to Suck My Dick
I hate all your ugly, stupid, too fat, too thin, too short, too tall,
too rich, too poor, too humorless, too pathetic, too unintellectual,
too pedestrian, too suburban, too mainstream, too short-sighted,
too ignorant, too conniving, too dishonest, too two-faced,
TOO UGLY girlfriends.
It’s hard not to think that Swifties are secretly rooting for a divorce within seven years. Think of how incredibly mediocre that album will be.