the pursuit of happiness
thoughts of suicide make me happy
nice to know there's a way out
even if I don't take that exit route just yet
glad to know it's there
can't get out of the chair
know I should do the laundry
why try to be clean
why ever get up again
searching for crap on the internet
only makes me depressed
television is mind rape
but I watch anyway
read an existential novel
dream of a cause worth dying for
dream of a fuck worth lying for
dream of a death to get the job done
forgot to take my pill the other night
haven't felt right since then
guess if I ever go off them
that's when suicide will beckon
bleeding ass
sagging waist
broken feet
damaged brain
waiting for relief
don't have the courage
or energy yet
I'm such a jerk