I built a city in the desert.
Lithium and plastic and dry cellulose.
Autonomous flying cars.
Drone-delivered impossible everything,
Nourishing our body-positive bodies.
Streaming, bingeable Obama-produced documentaries
In every remote classroom.

There was even a monorail.

How many Amazon delivery trucks are repurposed UPS delivery trucks? Any number is enough to make me laugh at the irony of good business.

I built a city in the desert.
Lithium and plastic and dry cellulose.
Autonomous flying cars.
Drone-delivered impossible everything,
Nourishing our body-positive bodies.
Streaming, bingeable Obama-produced documentaries
In every remote classroom.

There was even a monorail.

You know it’s going to be a good day when the first conversation you have with your partner is a disagreement over what time it is.

If the Russians want to use my privacy to sell whatever Russians sell or attempt to influence another American election, the joke is on them. I don’t have any privacy. None of us do. Google and Facebook and your own stupid phone saw to that years ago.

CNN announced that the word of 2018 was “Justice.” I’ve read on Medium that the word of 2018 was “Trauma,” “Resist,” and “Moments.” Also, “Truth,” “Rage,” Fuck,” and “Listen.”

All wrong.

Santa told the elves it was time to leave, take 10 pounds of reindeer jerky on your way out.

Santa explained that the Naughty List was at its highest since 2008. Great for the coal industry. Bad for toy making.