Chasing Our Tails: The Russian Hackers Knew Us Better Than We Thought

We laugh because dogs, while often more intelligent than we think, aren't as intelligent as we want them be nor as savvy as those fucking dogs in the movies.

Many dogs never get the urge to chase their tails and, if you've ever tried to teach one that does you understand the near impossibility of it. The dog that chases its tail is blind to the distinctions.

Why do dogs chase their tails, though?

My 600-pound Bowl of Cheesy Fear

Snickers Bar = 250 calories
Two Pop Tarts = 400 calories
A plate of Curly Fries = 600 calories
Wendy’s signature Apple Pecan Chicken Salad = 570 Calories

Christ - even Fast Food salads pack on the shit like duct taping clay to your ass.

Hook Me Up

They say meeting through friends is a good way to meet someone worth dating. So, I started telling everyone I know I'm looking for a relationship. My boss, my co workers, my dry cleaner. I want everyone to know I am on the hunt and looking for something serious, so they can send me their cute and eligible guys.

And it worked. My dry cleaner, Helen, had someone for me. She said he was cute, responsible and has a job! Done. We had a date set up that Sunday.

Noble X - Episode 2: New Month's Eve

Slow rise chimes open John’s eyes at 6:00am. His body aches as if he was jumped the night before. There was no respite in sleep as his vivid dreams seemed to be saturated in his waking pain. Bizarre imagery and distorted vignettes, played out by his subconscious, made the rest feel less than soothing. But alas he had logged a few winks and it was time to report to work. 

The feeling of dread has been a daily occurrence. He showered and prepped for another day at school, dwelling in how frustrated he had recently become with the new job, spread so thin over too much bread, needing to be everywhere at once.  John fantasized about cloning himself to do a better job for his kids. It broke his heart a little bit every time when he couldn’t be there when each of them needed him. Juggling all their individual schedules had really taken a toll on him mentally.